Stephen Colbert reminded us that the president-elect Trump settled a $25 million fraud lawsuit over the weekend. Colbert spoke directly to the graduates of Trump University.
“As you leave these hallowed hotel ballrooms to start your lives, and then restart your educations at an actual school,” he said, “you will be entering a troubled world. For example, Donald Trump is going to be president.”
“But you are uniquely poised to take on that challenge, because real world experience is the best teacher,” he continued. “And you’ve been conned by a master.” He want to say, “I hope and pray that you will take the lessons of Trump University with you: The future is what you make of it! And also, never take business advice from a man who can’t sell vodka and steaks.”
“So go out there and be a shining example of Trump University’s timeless motto,” the host concluded. “‘Carpe Crotch-em.’”