Did you know that a shocking percentage of U.S. adults in dating age have reported feeling “not too safe” or “not safe at all” while meeting someone during a first date?
In this SSRS study on modern dating, 39% of the inquired have reported feeling unsafe during first-date encounters, with the percentage going up to a staggering 48% among female participants. Does this mean casual dating is just too much to bear in this day and age?
Well, no-strings dating doesn’t have to be dangerous, awkward, or even inconvenient, as long as both parties involved know what’s going on, provide consent, and are genuinely invested in exploring casual hookups.
If you’re a man or woman who wants to date casually without the drama, we have five golden rules that should help you:
- Communicate more clearly;
- Avoid scaring the other person away;
- Explore your sexual fantasies consensually.
Curious? Let’s get started!
1 – Be Clear About What You Want
Humans interact in complex, mysterious ways, and that’s why they must communicate their needs and feelings to others, even when they’re only looking for a steamy one-night stand. If you’re into no-strings dating, make sure to let the other person know of your intentions ahead of your first date.
Online dating apps make it easier than ever to do this; all you need is to write something about what you want in your profile’s bio. This will help you filter out potential dates who may not be interested in casual hookups and save tons of time in forgettable, mismatch encounters.
To increase your chances of finding like-minded individuals, use dating services that are aligned with your goals. While mainstream apps tailor to all sorts of individuals, there are many websites specifically designed for people to meet and fuck, with no strings attached!
If you’re not into online dating and prefer old-school blind dates with friends of friends, just make sure you let them know you’re not looking for a serious relationship at the start of the date (or even before).
2 – “Let’s Meet” Doesn’t Mean “Let’s Have Sex”
Dating can be scary for a lot of people (including nearly half of American women), so it’s very important not to scare them away with reckless, mindless behavior.
The essential rule to keep in mind? Even if someone agrees to a date and knows that you’re all about no-strings dating, that doesn’t mean you have officially granted the right to have sex with that person!
Never assume you’re entitled to something unless that has been unquestionably specified by the other person.
3 – Consent is a Work in Progress
Just like “Let’s meet” doesn’t mean “Let’s have sex”, consenting to kissing or some kinky foreplay isn’t the same as consenting to everything. In other words, consent is not a one-time event; it’s a work in progress, and it must be thoroughly respected and reviewed at every step of the process.
If a woman consents to having sex with you but not with your friends, tricking her into group sex is definitely a crime. The same applies if a woman consents to spend the night with you but you end up forcing her to do something she didn’t explicitly consent to (like, say, anal sex).
Guys can surely fall victim to the same trap, but that’s statistically less likely. For this reason, it’s even more crucial to establish consent at every step of the way if you’re a man meeting a woman.
4 – Put Yourself in the Other Person’s Shoes
Putting yourself in the other person’s shoes is a general rule of decency that can make wonders for your dating life. It applies to the big stuff, like consent, but also to less fundamental aspects of dating, like being punctual or just acting nice.
Would you like your next date to keep you waiting for half an hour? Then, try your best not to do that yourself! Treating others just like you would like to be treated sounds like a simple enough task, but it requires more thought and consideration than we may assume at first. Make sure you take some time to reflect on it ahead of your next date.
5 – Be Open About Your Fantasies (So They May Come True)
So, your date’s been great, consent has been established, and it seems like you and the other person are fully ready to get it on! Well, this is the time to stop being shy and open up about your fantasies, what you like in bed, or what you expect from a casual hookup.
Since no-strings dating is all about exploring your kinks, don’t miss out on the opportunity of actually doing so. We know it can be hard to open up about your weird fetish with someone you just met, but honest communication can take you a long way without necessarily scaring the other person away.